Submitted this week to the home office for approval:

The Weather – News flash! It’s hot, humid and the air is crappy. Guess what? IT’S SUMMER. If the same thing happens in January, then you can put it on the front page.

The Air Quality Color Scale – Speaking of the weather, who’s idea was it to assign the same color scheme to the homeland security system as they use for the ozone alert system in the Washington area? The radio announced a "code red alert" yesterday and half the area paniced (and went to the beach :-)

The Hummer – This thing (original or 2) must be the most pretentious piece of crap on the road. Except maybe for that SUV from Cadillac.

Games On Your Cell Phone – Hey, cell phone companies! Before you try to sell me stupid games on an itty bitty screen, try producing reliable service at a reasonable price. And, yes, I can still hear you so kill those idiot ads.